Alone and Unobserved

Yesterday, I entered enemy territory for the first time in over a year. I am referring, of course, to BYU Campus, home of the infamous Honor Code, Carri Jenkins the spokesdemon, and scads of closeted, conflicted homosexuals. Oh, and many, many uptight, self-righteous, straight BYU students as well. This journey was not a light undertaking, but the prize was enormous: a chance to attend my ex-girlfriend Anni’s Sometimes-Annual Flammen Kuchen Party.

With that goal in sight, I rode the light rail and bus for two whole hours to travel the 46.6 miles from my house to the BYU Foreign Language Student Residence, where I lived for three and a half years and where my ex currently resides. The Flammen Kuchen was exquisite and flavorful, as usual, and the company much more congenial than I had expected, given the fact that most of the attendees hadn’t ever met a soul-sucking demon from hell before and I wasn’t sure how they would react. But aside from a few uncomfortable conversations that really emphasized what an insulated environment BYU is, and how much I’ve changed since I was part of it, it was a fun time, and I was almost sad when it was time for the two-hour journey back to Salt Lake.

“Flammen Kuchen is its own reward,” as the saying goes, and I had lots of Flammen Kuchen. I also received Anni’s “The Faithful-est Friend of Them All” Award for traveling not only the farthest but also the longest for her party (besides the whole “agreeing against my better judgment to confront my personal demons and set foot on BYU campus” thing). Oh, and I had totally forgotten how many hot guys there were at BYU. Another plus. Am I saying that I had fun in the middle of enemy territory? I guess so! That’s . . . amazing.