Alone and Unobserved

I’ve decided to change the way I think about myself, in hopes of changing my behavior and finding a little motivation. As I’ve looked at myself and my life over the past few months, I’ve realized that one reason I’m failing to do certain things, and am failing to avoid doing others, is because I’ve stopped thinking of myself as a person who does certain things and doesn’t do others. I stopped going to the gym and swimming because I stopped thinking of myself as a person who went to the gym and went swimming; instead I started thinking of myself as a person who did everything he could to avoid exercise. I stopped cleaning my house because I stopped viewing myself as a person who cleans his house, but instead as a person who is so depressed/tired/busy/apathetic/other that I couldn’t be bothered to get to that right now.

By the way, I’m a little embarrassed to post these resolutions here, partly because I’m afraid I won’t live up to them, and then the entire internet will bear witness to my failure, and partly because once you know what I aspire to be you’ll know where I’m currently falling short. BUT I DIGRESS.

1. I will think of myself as a thin person.
   1. I want to go back to the gym, and take the stairs at work instead of the elevator, and not subsist on french fries and lattes, and eat the occasional vegetable and fruit.
2. I will think of myself as frugal.
   1. I want to eat at home more, and bring a lunch to work most days, and budget, and hunt for bargains, and live within my income, and pay off my debts, and SAVE.
3. I will think of myself as a person with a cute, inviting apartment.
   1. I want to be one of those people who stop by a boutique and buy an attractive throw or pillow, and who have plants (and WATER them!), and who keep their home spick and span, and who buy furniture that is functional but attractive and inexpensive.
4. I will think of myself as a bike person, He Who Bikes.
   1. I want to own a bike, as well as all the relevant biking gear, and ride my bike to work, and to the store, and to the theater. Maybe not to the club. That’s a little geeky even for me. But this way I get transportation and exercise. I win both ways!

Feel free to discuss the way you and others think about themselves, your opinion of the efficacy of my method, and your own resolutions in the comments.